Tuesday, September 6, 2011

"Goodbye Grandpa"

In the last two weeks we have taken two trips to Georgia. A couple weeks ago, Tom's Grandpa Anderson had a fall and went into a coma. There were signs that his grandfather would not come out of the coma and so Tom decided to skip classes so we could go down to say goodbye. The whole trip down to Georgia I was thinking how blessed I am that I am not working anymore so I could just pick up and leave with my husband.

We spent a day and a half there with family and at the hospital and it was a touching experience to see Tom say goodbye to his grandfather. It was touching also to see the care that each of Grandpa Anderson's children gave him in his last moments.

We spent this last weekend back there again for the funeral.

The whole weekend was a very touching experience for me. While it wasn't a happy reason to go and visit family, we were able to enjoy the company of almost all of Tom's siblings and families as well as all his dad's siblings and families.

The first experience I found incredibly touching was in the viewing before we went to the chapel, Tom's 3-year-old cousin was being a little noisy as they were closing the casket. Someone told him that he needed to be quieter because they were closing the casket and he said, somewhat loudly, "Goodbye Grandpa" in his adorable 3-year-old voice. It was perfect.

During the eulogy, Grandpa Anderson's brother-in-law told how the Andersons didn't know the word "in-law" and as I thought back on the few times that I had actually spent with Tom's grandparents I could see how that statement is true. From day one I have always been treated like a granddaughter, daughter, sister, cousin, niece and aunt as if I had always been part of the family. I am so grateful for this. I know many people do not have this blessing and I know how lucky I am.

Tom and I were talking with his Grandma and she was saying, (as she did many times this weekend) how she was always supposed to go first. And she was worried that Grandpa would be given some big calling in heaven and he wouldn't have time to watch over her because he would full-heartedly fulfill his calling. Tom and I thought over this and we came to the conclusion that we don't think we ever get released from the calling of husband and father (or wife and mother for the women) and that will be one of the responsibilities we will have to fulfill even though we are in heaven. It will be like being a bishop, you have stewardship over so many people, but you still can't neglect your family. I think Grandpa will definitely be taking care of his family, even though he is not with us here on earth.

Tom and I have joked a little about what would happen if one of us passes away first. I always tell him I want to live until I'm 100 and then he can come get me the next day, after my big party. I like to think that I would be this tough woman if Tom went first, but I don't know how true that statement is. As I've been reflecting on this weekend's events, I can't help but think how incredibly I would miss Tom if he were not here with me. And I like to think Tom would be incredibly lost without me, although he would probably be ok. But I don't think he could ever find another person who would get as much joy out of a 10 hour car ride full of pathology questions and reading as I do! I am so grateful for the testimony I have of eternal families. I am so grateful that I can be with Tom, joking around with him and going on road trips and talking for long periods of time with him and testing each other on science and making plans for our future, that I can do all this with him FOREVER! Wow, I LOVE THIS MAN!

So while it wasn't the best of reasons to spend with the family, I am grateful for this weekend. I am grateful for my family relationships and I am grateful for how my testimony was strengthened.